Finding the Courage to Go Sober

woman climbing rock face- sober courage

Have you ever heard alcohol described as liquid courage? When you were young were you told to drink like a man, or that booze would put hair on your chest? As a young woman, I often took pride in drinking dangerously. I associated drinking with my badass identity. But it took far more courage for me to go sober than it ever took to drink or to survive the consequences of drunk. Going sober, staying sober, and eventually owning it publicly has been one of the bravest things I’ve ever done.

If you do Dry July, Sober September, Dry January or any one-month alcohol-free challenge, then you most likely deal with a bit of discomfort at not drinking, but that is a different sort of discomfort from the discomfort of knowing that you need to stay sober for life. Knowing that you need to stay sober takes courage to own. Courage means making yourself vulnerable by admitting that you have a problem. Courage is breaking from the pack and going your own way. We asked our online community, Boom Rethink the Drink :

What does Courage mean to you? Does it take courage to stop drinking? Why?

Courage…….being afraid of the path that lies ahead and taking it anyway.

The most courageous (and humbling) thing I did was stop lying to myself about having a drinking problem and being unable to control it. It took me years to be honest enough with myself that I could just go ahead and stop. The truth really has set me free. Making the daily decision to be AF (alcohol-free ) is by no means easy, but it’s a hell of a lot easier than it was to accept the truth.

To me courage means being afraid of something but doing it anyway. 

Courage means forging ahead and doing the right thing (which is usually the hardest thing) and not letting anything stop you, including fear and other overwhelming obstacles.  Yes, in my opinion, it does take courage to stop drinking.  It takes courage to fight through the habits and brain chemistry that have developed in response to alcohol abuse.

Courage is making a change . As uncomfortable as it is at times 💥

Courage means walking away from the safe comfortable routines that may have become unhealthy or are keeping you stuck…and reaching out for new things that may take time to adjust to. Things that you won’t know are better until you give them a chance. Courage is accepting that you may have to go it alone for a while. Break from the pack. Fight for what you know is right even if it hurts . It took desperation for me to stop drinking but it too courage to stay sober. To not go back and hide in the safe place when the going got rough

Courage. To me is being brave enough to seek help. 🌺🌺💃💃💪💪

I’m finding out that it doesn’t take any courage at all to stay on the alcohol tread mill, it’s stepping off, and into the unknown world of real life, real problems, and making real decisions to better yourself is where real courage is 

Make Courage your middle name…..

Who am I?  Why am I here?  Can I live without booze?  All questions we ask ourselves when we finally collapse and admit we have a problem with our drinking.

In our image obsessed society, we have to find a way to detach, not only from booze, but from the constant need to curate our ‘brand’ identities on social media and to stop comparing ourselves with others.

The sickest part of modern society is the lie we’re told about how our lives should/must be, what we should be doing at what age, and where we should be aiming for.  It doesn’t allow us to find out who we really are, beneath the conformity and the booze which is part of that conformity.  What’s our true nature?  What is our personality type, and what are the habits and tips which work for us.

So, in the early days sober, start exercising your courageous genes: researching  alcohol-free options at bars, hotels and restaurants you’re planning visiting; not joining your friends in drinks at home, instead, opening a chilled bottle of AF wine or beer, meeting at cafes, rather than bars and  going out for a walk at 8am instead of nursing a hangover.  And the courage to try something new today.

I wish you the gift of courage, whatever day you’re at.  

S Sometimes you have nothing left to give 
O Only tiredness remains 
B But you just carry on anyway 
R Really you can’t keep filling your stress bucket up
I It will overflow 
E Eventually and
T The drink you are turning to will hurt 
Y You

C Courage to turn your back on
A Alcohol could free you so then
N Negative emotions can start to 

H Heal
E Eventually with support and 
L Lots of help your broken 
P Pieces will be put back together differently 

Y You are stronger than you know 
O Ordinary things you’ll handle and you’ll 
U Understand how to confront and resolve bigger issues better sober 

W We’re all in this together 
I Including chaotic times so please 
N Never feel alone, someone can always help 📢

Courage to me means taking a chance by making yourself vulnerable –  Courage, Bravery, Determination… to have a better life. Sometimes the things that we are trying to drink away take incredible courage to face and it is an amazing feeling to wake up and know that we can face those things without drowning them. When I was drinking I was always pretending that everything was ok- It took courage to admit that I was losing control. It took courage to admit that I did not have control, that I could not drink and needed help.

“Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy—the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.”
― Brene Brown

I never thought I’d have the courage to say things online that I’ve been able to say here. It is freeing to let it all out and share. I feel safe here. I don’t feel judged here. The support is unconditional here. We respect each other here. For this, I’m eternally grateful.

Trust me, I’m no angel & many nights, for me, ended up in blackouts & tears. But thanks to the support of this community, I’ve had the courage to keep going. Courage to not give in. I’m so grateful that I saw alcohol for what it really was…. a bully & a liar .

Never stop trying .

more reading :

Ditching the Shame When You Go Sober

From Sober Curious to Sober Courageous

“Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy—the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.”
― Brene Brown

If you’re “sober curious” … If you are drinking too much too often and want to stop or take a break…or if you have stopped drinking and are trying to stick to sober! Talk to Us. 

We are an independent, anonymous and private community who share resources, support and talk it through every day. It helps to have a community behind you in a world where alcohol is the only addictive drug that people will question you for NOT using

You can read more about us Here And join  Here

community support 24-7 or sign up and sign in here

Don’t let the shame of the stigma keep you from saying

“I think I have a problem with drinking”

Courage is a heart word. The root of the word courage is cor – the Latin word for heart. In one of its earliest forms, the word courage meant “To speak one’s mind by telling all one’s heart.” Brene Brown

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