That terrorist’s web was hard to leaveInsisting that I had to believeThat one won’t hurtYou earned this treatFood on the tablePlenty to eatI functioned fineNo one knewAll seemed wellHidden wineThis was my gameNo room for twoLeave me alone with my hidden shameI’ll deal with it laterWhen things are more calmNot today thoughSweaty palmCrack open a
The blackouts now were very real Thank god I was never behind the wheel My lying was catching up with me Never did I really seeHow much the booze was affecting me But now I saw that my brain was involved That’s scary to me As I’m getting old Not only am I on the floor I can barely remember
I guard my lifeIt’s up to meNo one to blame now I’m freeThe days were darkI’d got embroiledIn a life of numbingCouldn’t face a day aheadOf mundane tasks & grumpy facesAll my thoughts were taken upGaging time , filling cupWatching the clock & planning aheadGaging his home time , the fear & dreadWould he know
When I decide to get dressed up and go on a night out socialising I know I could do with realising If and when I have the urge to drink I should probably pause and think Hard And hope I can take a shovel along from my garden or backyard I just might need it to dig myself
What? Not drinking? Ever? You are joking, aren’t you? It took me many attempts at moderation to finally realise that. ‘What’s the point in just 1 glass? ‘ It took up so much of my head-space that it nearly took my head. I thought I was going crazy. Alcohol turned me into some wild banshee.