I’ve been free from the shackles of alcohol for over three years now and my oh my has life changed in the most wonderful of ways. Yet that amount of time ago, plus one day, I was gripped by an addiction to alcohol that had overtaken my life. Drinking was my favourite thing! Or at least it had been……waking at 3 in the morning sweating, with palpitations, having joint pain and the beginnings of what I suspect was gout and the fear that I was killing myself one bottle at a time wasn’t much fun. Nor were the hangovers and the shame….my oh my the shame……. and the damage I inflicted on my relationships when a drinking session ended in a blackout or some unjustified temper……I could go on…….still with all that said every single day I was consumed with when I could drink! Getting through the day until ‘wine o clock’!
What I couldn’t know at the time was that drinking had sucked so much joy out of my life the only time I was truly happy was when I was drinking. And even then only for about half an hour before I was something else, usually absorbed in how much I could drink, managing my behaviour (or not) etc. Anyway all of that is by the by really. We all have our own relationship with alcohol. Our own highs and horrors.
These days I have a passion. I exercise and enjoy it! I use my mind and challenge myself. Things are no longer ‘too much bother’. I wake early in the morning, I regularly used to stay in bed until 1 in the afternoon on a weekend???!!!! I feel ALIVE! and I am loving life in a way I can’t ever remember loving life before…..it is AWESOME!!!!
I wrote this today to reassure everyone here who is on the rollercoaster of stopping drinking, failing, starting again, trying to moderate, failing, stopping and so on. The only way to fail at stopping drinking is to stop trying! It took me 6 years, on and off, to finally break free. I’ve waxed lyrical about how I stopped and what supports I used in the past so I won’t repeat it all again here. Suffice to say just because you have tried to stop drinking 8 million times and have failed? Don’t worry! Dust yourself off and try again, because it might just be this next time that you finally manage to get off the hamster wheel of hell that is drinking!
Shame corrodes the very part of us that we need to break free. So keep trying! ditch that shame, start being kind to yourself and give yourself the gift of sobriety today! Sure there is a really shitty bit to get through before you are all rainbows and unicorns out the other side but man oh man is it worth it!
I can’t get back all those years I wasted but I will be present in every moment of my life now, until the day I take my last breath. Even difficult times aren’t so difficult when you are sober and in control of yourself and your actions!
So never stop trying
If alcohol made you happy
if it cured boredom
if it solved your relationship issues
If it gave more then it takes
Would you be reading this?
So if you’re thinking about drinking but know that’s not the best idea come Talk to Us.
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