It can be daunting to imagine staying sober forever. I remember in my first weeks alcohol-free thinking, “I won’t be able to drink at my children’s weddings!?” Keep in mind, neither of my children was getting married…or were engaged…In fact, they were 11 and 15 when I stopped drinking. But it is the spectre of FOREVER that troubled me and troubles many when they stop drinking. I saw living alcohol-free forever as this looming, daunting, seemingly impossible goal. And then someone in my online community said “Forever is actually a relief to me.”
And suddenly, for a moment, a switch was thrown.
What if sober forever is actually a comfort? What if, instead of viewing the enormity of forever as something I need to conquer, I view it as a part of my journey, a positive force that brings relief. Rather than viewing it as a loss, not being able to drink forever I view as a gain – I can have sobriety forever! I can be alcohol-free forever! What a relief!
Perspective is a powerful thing.
I saw an interesting video asking people what they had lost to addiction. Let’s turn that on its head and ask what can you re-gain from sobriety?
These are some answers from my online comunity . What a difference sobriety makes!
Giving up alcohol has given me my sense of self back. It’s given me my strength back. It’s given me new beginnings with my husband and daughter, and it’s given me endings with things that didn’t serve a purpose. It’s given me freedom and control over my life, and it’s given me purpose, ambition and the drive to chase that ambition. Lastly, it’s given me a sense of okay. Everything will be okay, even when it’s not.
Living alcohol-free gives me a certain spark and edge that nothing else can give!
Being alcohol-free allowed me to be the mum my daughter always knew I was. I realised how much she needs me in this world, and that is not a burden, that is why I’m here, to be her mum.
Being alcohol-free gave me back my dignity. God it’s good to have that back, that grubby down and dirty feeling I used to get is gone and I hope to never feel it again.
I feel goodness again and I feel worthy of love.
Elegance. There is a grounded elegance I feel in sobriety.
Living alcohol-free means I have self-respect, dignity, joy, ease, and purpose. Staying sober has drastically improved my relationship with my husband, my relationship with my kids, and my relationship with myself. I have the full power of my creativity and intellect for the second 50 years of my life. Stopping drinking has brought endless open possibilities, a love of life, a love of who I am and where I am right now rather than an endless wishing that things will get better. Sobriety has brought me light.
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