I loved my first year alcohol free.
It was a year of discovery.
It was the year I got my pride back.
I LOVED IT 😊
Many people fear when they stop drinking that life will be boring but my life alcohol free was very, very far from boring.
I thought I’d wasted my life.
I thought my life was nearly over.
I was 50 and what had I done etc etc
(I was menopausal by the way so a bit over dramatic 🤣)
Once I started DOING something about my situation with habitual binge drinking my life opened up.
I’ve done so many things since I stopped drinking and best of all I enjoyed them so much more without the booze.
So no my first year was very far from boring and my second and subsequent years got better and better.
That doesn’t mean I didn’t think of booze
And still do.
I don’t mean the ‘I want to drink’ voice lasts forever, or that you crave booze forever, it’s just that booze is everywhere ! And I think every single day about how proud I am that I’m out of that alcohol trap.
Yes almost every single day for 6 years I think of booze but now in a dismissive way.
How do you know it’s time to stop drinking?
WHEN YOU SPEND YOUR DAY WISHING YOU DIDN’T DRINK – AND THEN DO DRINK ?
It’s time to Commit!
I don’t know why it took so much time to make the commitment – I tried for soooo long.
Everyone else might not have known – but I did.
Do you know what I mean?
It hit me that if I kept giving in and drinking I’d always be unhappy. So I made the decision that if I committed to not drinking for one year I would still be unhappy about that choice but I was unhappy anyway.
If I never did it I’d never know what it could be like – to compare
– and that made me feel really sad. 😢
So although it was very hard I made that choice.
It wasn’t as hard as I’d thought. Not when you spend every single day of your life wishing you were not drinking. What I mean is even though it was hard I knew that I was at least doing something right at last. I’d taken the choice of whether to drink or not away. I got my pride back pretty soon because of that. For myself.
I had to do it for me. I was sick of thinking the same thoughts every day over and over again. So I stuck at it whatever happened. Refused to give in.
This is hard at first. My god some days I wanted to drink so badly. And the next day was easy peasy. It’s easy then it’s hard, it’s better then it’s not.
But the good parts take over.
It’s the good parts that shine out.
There are no more bad memories from booze. The bad days are just bad days.
Accept now, that you will not lose the memory of how much you loved that first glass or two. Yes you’ll crave alcohol sometimes. But letting those cravings simply wash away will become easier and easier with time. Stay alcohol-free and you will become truly free.
This was me 6 years ago … Thinking about making the commitment to stop drinking. My first post to my online community.
Feeling very nervous but elated about joining this site.
It’s time to cut down or better still stop drinking alcohol.
I had a great Christmas overall. My daughter and her partner came home. But one horrible night I had been preparing food in the kitchen and we all had a few drinks. I had a couple of wines. My son, daughter and their partners started playing a party game and when I joined in they said I was obviously drunk but very funny, at first, but then I started ranting at my poor hubby and them and completely spoiled the night.
And I am ashamed to say I don’t remember any of it. I was so embarrassed when they told me the next day, and obviously my son and daughter were too. Especially as their partners witnessed their mother making a complete fool of herself. They all could hardly look at me at first and my son and daughter sat me down and said I need to address this. Because now I am being truthful to myself it’s not the first time this has happened. I hold down a really stressful job and suppose I stupidly see wine as my ‘treat.’ But it turns me into someone that no one recognises. Certainly not me. They have said that now even after a glass or two of wine I become ‘Spaced out’ as they call it. And I’ve known I need to change for a long time. The rest of Christmas was fantastic and I didn’t need a drink to enjoy it. But it was easy not to drink as I was still so ashamed. And I was aware they were all nervously watching me to make sure I didn’t drink and turn into someone else. Which is a bit pathetic when you are supposed to be the role model for them. I really want to change now but drinking alcohol has been such a big part of my social life since I was young. I found this site on Google and once I got the courage to join tonight I admit some of your comments have made me really cry as I recognise myself in so many of the situations you talk about. Starting to feel more positive now I have you all to talk to.
And now me at 6 years alcohol-free
ALCOHOL IS THE TIP OF THE ICEBERG
So that’s Christmas over my 6th Anniversary alcohol free. In the first few years I had words to say – but it’s all so normal to me now I wonder what to say to those of you in the early stages. I never forget how hard it was. The only thing I can tell you all is that it’s so worth it. I didn’t manage to get on here to put a post on 26th December. My house was too full of family every day.
My house is still full. Full of the people (my daughter and son and families) who first made me face my drinking head on and find a site like this.
My house is full of the little people who have been born since I found a site like this (grandchildren) and who ironically I’m now the only one trusted by their parents to look after them – because I’m dependable and sensible and trustable – all because I now don’t drink alcohol.
You couldn’t make it up….
When I first started this AF business I thought I just had to not drink alcohol. Learn how to do without it in my life.
Funnily enough my drinking was just the tip of the iceberg.
Slowly it became apparent that my drinking was due to the effect of multiple causes and personality traits. Causes and personality traits I struggled to accept and control – that made me look for ‘something’ to help me to cope with my life.
I chose alcohol.
Cheap, legal, socially acceptable and absolutely deadly to some of us…..
The reasons I liked alcohol to ‘increase and decrease’ my emotions took years to get to the bottom of and are still being found out by me.
I know some of you have got through Christmas by the skin of your teeth. I know you may still yearn for alcohol. I know it seems like everyone in the World is drinking alcohol but you.
Keep going, you’ll get ‘there’ – if you truly decide you want to be ‘there.’ You have to be serious about this and really want to be ‘there’ this time.
– Aim for a life and a place where alcohol is just not needed anymore.
That doesn’t mean life isn’t hard at times, but it isn’t to alcohol that you turn to to get through it all.
The more I learn about alcohol the more I dislike it. What it does to so many, in so many ways. I can’t stand the smell and I can’t stand the taste. It’s so obvious to me now how toxic it is to the human body.
So whereas my need to be alcohol-free at the beginning meant I had a ‘problem’ – in not drinking it I’ve learnt I’m actually the sensible one after all… How ironic….
If you’re “sober curious” … If you are drinking too much too often and want to stop or take a break…or if you have stopped drinking and are trying to stick to sober! Talk to Us.
We are an independent, anonymous and private community who share resources, support and talk it through every day. It helps to have a community behind you in a world where alcohol is the only addictive drug that people will question you for NOT using
Ask Yourself these questions ( you’ll find our answers inside BOOM at the linked titles)
and we’re there to help with answers to these as well
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