A friend asked me last week if I was really never going to drink again. I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately.
I’m on a 12 month HSM but would have chosen lifetime if the option had existed.
When I joined HSM I was at that magical place where I was really ready to stop. It wasn’t easy but I knew that I had no choice.
Something changed in my reaction to the nightly “de stress” drinking ritual around the age of 48. I began to drink as if there was no end to my thirst. My two hour ritual of buzzing out was becoming more important to me than my self or my family and I was afraid.
For me I think that the big difference between March 6 2015 and all of the other days that I decided I would never drink again was the realization that I was truely hooked and would never be able to moderate again.
The other difference was HSM.
There are so many things in our different cultures that encourage us to keep drinking. We really are taught that it is the most natural thing in the world for adults to de stress with alcohol.
We’re taught that it’s heroic to handle a hangover well.
But it’s not true…it’s just simply not true.
Alcohol robs us of our self respect, our dignity, our future.
But you know what?…It’s beautiful on the other side of the bridge.
Rainbows, unicorns and sun dappled foliage.
I have learned in the past 4 months that there really is absolutely nothing solved by drinking. There is no relationship or event improved by including alcohol. Really.
It takes a bit of time to realize that. Each time you ignore the little voice in your head that encourages you to drink it will get quieter. Starve that little voice and it will die.
At this point I don’t crave alcohol anymore. But I will never drink again because I know that I crossed a line and am addicted.
I want everyone to feel as proud, focused, calm and centered as I do today.

If You’re Drinking too much too often Talk to Us.
We are a private group, tucked away from the busy, commercial noise of social media. Joining and participating is completely free of charge. We are about community, about telling our stories and sharing ideas.
Alcohol is the only addictive drug that people will question you for NOT using.
You can read more about us Here
And join Here
Open aBook, open abrowser, open your mind.
Related Posts from the Boozemusings Community Blog :
Guide to your First Month of Sobriety : Why and How to Quit
Breaking the Spell of Wine o’ Clock
Related posts from Inside the BOOM Community :
2 responses to “127 days and counting”
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