This is a map from drunk to sober. A map that I drew along the way with help from the people here. Today I am 50 years old and 110 days alcohol-free ! 110 days without a hangover. 110 days sober and holding fast. Not even the Covid19 lockdown could break my stride.

I had planned months before Christmas that I was going to give up alcohol in January. For how long I didn’t know. I just knew my body and mind had enough of this poison and my life was going down the drain.

When I really thought about alcohol, and about how it was beginning to take control and affect me in ways it never had before, I tried (like most do) to say to myself I’ll cut down. I’ll just be a social drinker. That’s what I’ll do! And for a while that was fine. My reluctance to admit I have an unhealthy relationship with alcohol is only a recent thing. I’ve been in what the Northside Dubliners call Da Nile.

I was diagnosed with major depression in 2012 and had spent the last 7 years looking for reasons as to why me? I had been to rehab, doctors, etc. to beat the band. Every time I found a medication, a talk therapy, a possible way forward, I thought I had found mecca, only to be disappointed again and again. So as the years went on I became more disappointed. Always turning to meds and alcohol for comfort in copious amounts. I drank more to feel better.

In September I withdrew from life.
I self isolated and drank my troubles away and away.
I turned off the phone.
I just functioned.
I was well prepared in advance for Covid 19.

My ability to function went downhill. Rolling like a giant cartoon snowball it took family, friends and career along the way.

I had two options left in December- Die or live – I chose life.

I’m not here to say look at me how good am I. I’m here to say there is hope, there is a way, and if I can do it … trust me anyone can!

I’m nothing special. I’m just an ordinary Joe. The only difference or edge I may have on some people trying to stop drinking is Experience. I’ve been in that black hole. I can’t go there again and climb back out. My focus is sharp. I know for me moderation is a non runner. A time sober is no good. It’s as simple as life or death, A or B.

You see I used to see alcohol as a friend.

But …

Alcohol is one of those friends…
at first you’re the best buddies.
Ya go out, ya sing, ya dance, ya laugh
Ya love, you do loads of cool stuff together.
He’s there at your birthday parties.
He’s there at all the weddings you go to and the funerals.
He’s there at the birth of your children and every celebration you go to.
He never let’s you down.
What a fucking guy and mate he is.

But then

It’s like he gets jealous and turns nasty. He doesn’t wanna share you with all your other friends and family. He wants you every night then day. He loves you so much. He controls how you feel, how you work, how you love, who your friends are. What a guy !

You really can’t live without him
OR can you?

Ask yourself
All the stuff I’ve typed up above
If this was a person, a friend, a lover, a spouse
Would you want them?
Yes for a while until one day you’d go
Fuck this I’m outta here I don’t need you or your shit!

This is ALCOHOL
He’s not friend
He’s a manipulative fucker
Who’s only out for himself
What he can get
He doesn’t care for you one bit
He frolics in your dispear and depression

Oh look how you suffer with hangovers
How you lose your friends how you lose your family
Hahahahaha

The evil bastard chuckles

This is the reality of your friend alcohol. Take a good look at him. Am I making all this up ? He sucks the best out of you. Why let this bastard win? You deserve better – your real friends deserve better

Yes he is unable to control lots of people
They’re able to use him at celebrations etc and then put him back in his cage

But guess what
You can’t If you could you wouldn’t be here

Start removing the chains from this predator. Day by day have less contact with him. We’re your back up here on Boom.
Your security guards. We will all tell him
FUA ( fuck you alcohol). Until he gets the hint.

I believe I have a path to follow
Will I stumble? Will I fall over?
Yes of course !
That’s life regardless of alcohol.

In the last few weeks I’ve been to a pub with friends and enjoyed AF beer. I’ve started a veg garden and I am productive everyday. I am kinder to others and myself
I’ve been to a wedding and survived it (just about) And today the icing on the cake ! I attended an interview for a job this morning and I have just been told I’ve got the job.

3 short months ago I couldn’t get out of bed

So in 110 days alcohol free, 110 days sober, to say my live has changed would be an understatement.

Time is precious
Too precious to sit looking into a glass and a bottle everyday
For what?

All the things you think alcohol helps you to deal with?

You think alcohol helps you deal with stress, makes you happier, makes you more attractive, makes you more confident, makes you funnier.

It doesn’t it’s all BOLLOCKS

Fuck you alcohol (FUA)

Join the winning team now!!!
Quit drinking for good
Believe in yourself
And do it
BOOM ! 😉

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If you’re “sober curious” … If you are drinking too much too often and want to stop or take a break…or if you have stopped drinking and are trying to stick to sober! Talk to Us. 

We are an independent, anonymous and private community who share resources, support and talk it through every day. It helps to have a community behind you in a world where alcohol is the only addictive drug that people will question you for NOT using

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Don’t let the shame of the stigma keep you from saying

“I think I have a problem with drinking”

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How do you go Sober? ( more reading in blue titles)

B Be accountable Talk to Us We Understand
A Avoid alcohol like the plague  Ideas Here
L Let yourself enjoy regular sober treats  Ideas Here
A Allow yourself to cry when needed  Ideas Here
N Nourish your body with good food  Ideas Here
C Create happy & fun memories  Ideas Here
E Enjoy the precious moments in your day Ideas Here

W Work hard to get what you want Ideas Here
O Organise things for less stress  Ideas Here
R Realise you can’t control it all Ideas Here
K Keep going & prepare for success Ideas Here
S Sleep enough for body & mind rest Sleep Solutions