Hungover, and feeling like shite on the morning of 31 December 2023; I promised myself that I would not “feel like this” in 2024”

I tricked myself into thinking I’d quit drinking for January only, and took it one day at a time. I was selfish (in focussing on me) and made plans. Early nights, ice cream, distracting walks, time on BOOM: whatever it took. I removed alcohol from the house, started walking daily, focussed on good food and balancing calorie intake, had early nights, changed my routine.

The grumps were strong, the fuckkit bucket was ever present. I talked to a psychologist for the first time. She validated my big life decisions. We never spoke about alcohol once. We solved for all the Other Things.

Then I convinced myself to keep going; “just to see” how long it could be. I amused and distracted myself with EVENING pickleball. Who does that! Out and active at wine time? Weirdos.

It was fun… and rewarding. Who knew.

Then the blur of March, April, May.

I’ve been working on getting this far with staying alcohol-free since at least 2016 – eight yearrrrs of battle (and the 20+ years of guzzling before that). And this time FINALLY it has stuck.

It HAD to.
Where was I going otherwise?

I am not superhuman. Every AF day is both a gift and takes work. Every day is a decision to not drink.

My other-half was abroad all March. It was either my opportunity to get back on the sofa with my old, yet destructive pal red wine; or an opportunity to prove myself. I chose the latter. Tricking myself into thinking “I could drink another time.” I focussed on calorie counting and exercise instead. My goal was to get my BMI from overweight to healthy. I did.

Covid, covid recovery, mumsie’s stroke, and dental surgery took up much of April & May. Looking back now it is a blur. The fukkit bucket was still present; but inching further away.

I got to June and realised I could make it to 6 months alcohol-free. I stuck to what I knew; activity (pickleball), long walks, BOOM, healthy food. And I made it. I realised that something had fundamentally shifted. I was not who I was. I liked who I had become; and partly, who I had returned to – a truer me.

The way I feel now 98% of the time (fit, alive, aware, peaceful, content) is not worth giving up for a night (or day) of fukkits.

I am not special. I haven’t got any secret super powers, or secret sauce to successfully navigating a year alcohol free. I didn’t know I would get here; and I didn’t know it was possible.

365 days ago, I had a raging hangover and thought I’d give an alcohol-free life another go. Again.

After at least 8 years of repeated day ones, and after a longgg relationship with alcohol (lets’s call it 49 – 15 = 34 years).

I was afraid of what was possible, of what I was “giving up”.

Turns out, I was giving up unhappiness, slavery (to alcohol that limited Real Life), bad health, lack of time, lack of clarity. Lack of self esteem.

It wasn’t scary. It was liberating. I started to like myself more. See little wins. Celebrated them. Practiced gratitude for every day. Learned to accept that my relationship with alcohol was ending. Finished.

I feel well.

Content.

Free.

I have saved thousands of dollars, lost a lot of weight. Become fit. I am less anxious. Less unhappy. My relationship is at it’s best. I know myself. I like myself!

Is life perfect? Nope! Is there still stress? Shitty times? Yup! But I acknowledge that alcohol would have only pulled me further under on those days.

I don’t want that.

I choose me. I choose life. One day at a grateful flipping time.

I won’t drink stupid alcohol today. It contributes nothing.

Join me in being alcohol-free today? And then let’s trick ourselves into being AF the next day; and the next… until it’s no longer a chore; but a genuine pleasure. 

WHO ARE WE?

Online Community Support to Stop Drinking – BOOM!

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