When I was a year sober I wrote a post to my community remembering where I had been when I finally stopped drinking alcohol — forever
One year ago I found myself literally on my knees I was hungover once again. My self-loathing in full swing I was desperate for it to end. I was so despondent that I begged my higher powers for the strength to become sober and to stop the self-loathing. I should clarify that communicating with my higher powers or praying was highly unusual for me. It was not something that I normally engaged in. However, I was so very desperate and had run out of ideas on how to make the madness stop.
I wrote that a bit over two years ago. It’s been two years now since my last drink, two years since I went alcohol-free 🙂 ! and I’ve been reflecting on all of the things that have helped me stay happily sober. I’ve been thinking about the many and varied sober resources that I’ve had in my toolbox. 12 Things that Helped me Stop Drinking and Stay Sober
William Porter’s book Alcohol Explained had a major influence on my understanding of how and why to stop drinking and stay stopped. And the BOOM Community has been my daily hang out for the past year and a bit. Everyday I’m there sharing ideas and giving and receiving support.
But back in December of 2017, it was this video that helped me make the decision to live an alcohol-free life. ( I also read her book )
I wrote this summary after watching the video and gave up drinking forever in the following month.
1. Don’t be negative about your decision to give up alcohol for 30 days. Be POSITIVE about not drinking for 30 days. List all of the positive things about not drinking. (Weight loss, no hangovers, better sleep).
2. Be firm about your decision to not drink for 30 days! No matter what! Don’t give yourself an out by saying well I will give it a try. Don’t use the word TRY… instead use…..I am NOT going to drink alcohol for 30 days.
3. Don’t use willpower. Instead, use reasoning. Make a list of all the reasons you drink. (To sleep, to relax, Alleviate boredom). Examine these reasons in depth.
Write it out!
Does alcohol really help me sleep?
Well maybe initially but then I wake up with an anxiety attack at 3 am. And I can’t sleep for the rest of the night. So the answer to that question is no…. alcohol does NOT help me sleep.
Related Post : Sleep Solutions
Does alcohol relax me?
Well for about 20 minutes and then the awful cycle of I want more! I need more! More! More! More! That is NOT relaxing at all! On top of that, I know that I drink so much sometimes to “relax” and that I get sick and very hungover the next day. No matter how I look at it…. a hangover is not relaxing. Hangovers make me feel ashamed of myself to yet again drinking too much. They make me worry about my health. This is not relaxing at all. Worst of all hangovers make me hate myself. Self-loathing is NOT relaxing. It is incredibly anxiety-inducing. So no, no, no alcohol does not relax me.
Related Posts : Alcoholic
Does alcohol alleviate boredom?
That one is BS. I know that drinking does NOT alleviate boredom. It actually turns me into an incredibly boring person. I sit and drink and turn into a bump on the sofa. I don’t do anything interesting. I don’t have any interesting thoughts. I don’t say anything interesting. I am very boring actually when I drink.
Related posts : Nobody Drinks Like I Do For Fun
Does alcohol help me connect with other people? Is alcohol the fuel that feeds my friendships and relationships?
This is the BIGGEST misconception that we have about alcohol. Think about it for a minute.
It really is amazing how we are expected to drink at every event that celebrates relationships….Family dinner parties, Dinner with friends, Dates, Sex, Weddings, Anniversaries, Funerals
Every single event that celebrates our connection to other human beings is supposed to include alcohol. But alcohol does not bind us together it eventually isolates us from each other. For me, it eventually took center stage and pushed relationships aside. It took precedence over my family. It was the fuel that fired senseless arguments .
But the most important relationship in my life that alcohol destroyed was my relationship with myself. It washed away my self-confidence. It isolated me from my creativity and passion by numbing my senses. And it held me down and isolated me with shame. Shame that I could not stop drinking.
Related Posts : Is Alcohol Dissolving Your Relationships
If you are feeling like your drinking is taking over your life. If you feel like it is causing you more pain than pleasure. If you’re in that sort of high functioning grey area where everyone else thinks you’re fine but you know that you are not – come hang out – Talk to Us.
It helps to have a community behind you in a world where alcohol is the only addictive drug that people will question you for NOT using
- Boozemusings is a lifestyle blog and the BOOM Community is a peer support group. We are NOT trained addiction counselors but simply a community of people who have overcome or are overcoming alcohol issues. We do not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment, nor does anything on this website create a physician/patient relationship. If you require medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment, please consult your physician.