Getting it – Why I Thought I Needed to Drink

One of the reasons it took me so long to stop drinking after I knew I needed to, was that I had learned that nightly drinking to de-stress was a normal part of adult life. The more stress in one’s life the more justification there was to drink it away at the end of the day.

I never imagined that as a sober person I would feel LESS stress. That the drinking to de-stress was actually amplifying the stress. 

I wrote the post below in my third alcohol-free month for a friend of mine who had the kind of high-stress job that we often assume requires a few drinks to endure. Putting these words together is part of how I stay alcohol-free. It’s all about looking beneath the surface of why I thought I needed to drink and letting those illusions go.

I will not drink today because I am So very happy to be free 

Join Me?

happy person after stop drinking

Getting It 

Before we can stop drinking we have to understand why we need to stop. That sounds simple but those of us who have gotten to that point where the drink leads to more pain than pleasure, know that it is not simple at all. 

We justify our drinking as an adult release.

We are entitled and of course, it is necessary

for us to have an off switch at the end of our crazy days. 

Our jobs and domestic responsibilities demand

more and more of us as we travel through adulthood.

Every cultural message that we have been fed

since early childhood teaches us that drinking

is what adults do to handle a hard day

or to celebrate a victory.

We all have been taught to think of an alcoholic

as a pathetic, broken-down soul

with a bottle in a brown paper bag

wasting away their health on a park bench.

Or a violent parent out of control and terrorizing their families every night until they finally pass out cold.

Those images protect us from the modern reality of alcohol abuse, don’t they?

I am not that thing.


I hold down a challenging job, care for my children and keep my household running smoothly.


But really the vast majority of problem drinkers are highly functional. Might be the Dr that doesn’t ask you the questions he should about your drinking when he realizes that your symptoms could be alcohol-related. Might be the school teacher who is just a little too edgy this morning because they are still ashamed of not remembering going to bed last night after the second bottle of wine.

A few months ago after many years of wondering, goggling, reading, questioning, doubting…I realized that it was me. And even though I really have known that for such a long time, doing something about it was the hardest thing that I’ve ever done.

And the best thing that I’ve ever done. 

More thoughts

Reading and Writing Your Way Happily Sober

If you’re drinking too much too often and want to stop or slow down, come talk to us.

Alcohol is the only drug that people question you for NOT using but you don’t HAVE to drink. Don’t stay trapped because the stigma of not drinking seems worse than the cost of drinking too much.

ReThink the Drink

You can read more about us Here

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More From The Boozemusings Community Blog :

Drinking to Get to the Bottom of Things?

Guide to your First Month of Sobriety : Why and How to Quit

Hey You Got a Minute ?

We’ll be Your Cornermen

More From The Boozemusings Community Blog :

5 great posts on the Science of Addiction

There is no shame in becoming addicted but the addiction itself will isolate you with shame. Shame is the food addiction feeds on, STARVE IT. Feed yourself with Community and Knowledge.

An Invitation


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